If you take a walk through Makerere-Kikoni, one of the series you will most likely hear students talk about is All American, a show I would highly recommend if you have not watched it.

All American is inspired by the life of National Football League line-backer, Spencer Paysinger, whose character is played by Daniel Ezra (Spencer James). It revolves around the lives of his friends, their families as they navigate love, friendships, growth, violence, American football, racial discrimination and a lot more in the black community and high school environment.

I am intrigued by a bunch of things in this series but I will focus on just one for now. I admired how the characters stand up for one another every time they have to, without losing themselves and their principles in the process.

Many times we go out of our way to be there for those we love, even if it means leaving ourselves compromised. When Oliver Baker was fighting for her sobriety after a phase of drug use that landed her in rehab, she was tempted to consume alcohol again and this got her into a fight with her parents.

She ran away from home and drove while under the influence of alcohol with Spencer, her boyfriend, in the car. They were pulled over by the police and she knew she would be in trouble for drink-driving and so, she asked Spencer to take the driver’s seat.

She did not only risk his life by driving while high but also asked him to take the blame for her. So many times, we get ourselves in trouble and expect other people to get us out of the messes we create, and get angry when others cannot come through for us.

Oliver later asked Spencer to accompany her as she faced her parents, but he makes it clear that she needed to do this herself. There are indeed roads we have to walk alone.

As much as our families and friends love us, it is not their responsibility to clean up after us; we have to face the consequences of our actions and sometimes, we have to do it alone. It does not mean our loved ones hate us; they are teaching us responsibility.

A similar scene is with Grace and her future husband, the former principal, Carter. He asked her to marry him and move with him to his new dream job. Billy Baker, coach and the new principal of Crenshaw, at the same time, had asked her to serve the school as a dean.

In one of her conversations with Billy, she let him know that she would base her decision entirely on whether she was ready to leave behind all the memories she had made in Crenshaw to be with her boyfriend or not.

This made me think of how many people expect those we love to drop their dreams for our own dreams, and hold it against them if they struggle with such a tough decision.

For a healthy relationship, it is necessary to know where to draw the line. As friends, do not put the people you love in situations where they have to compromise all the time to make you happy. One may say, ‘but to compromise is to show you love someone’; true, but is it mutual?

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Source: The Observer

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