(Continued from last issue)
David and Diane have been married for years; then there is Julie, the young secretary whose axis collides with the couple’s in ways none of them saw coming.
DIANE
I mentally kicked myself at least a dozen times as I drove back to my parents’ house that evening to deliver not just the girls’ toilet bags, but Daniel’s inhaler as well.
I could not believe I had forgotten them, especially Daniel’s inhaler that I always ensured he had within reach in case of an emergency, and the thought of what could have happened if he had had an attack, made me feel like a strong contender for the world’s most careless and irresponsible mother.
Not only had I just had a major parenting failure, but I had not done any better on the wife-homemaker role either. I felt awful that on our very first full day back, I had not been at the house to welcome David home from work with a nice homecooked dinner but, rather, was leaving him to make do with a take-away and, ironically, while my parents loved their grandchildren dearly, it was clear they were more bothered by the fact that their son-in-law was having a take-away for dinner, than that I had forgotten to pack Daniel’s inhaler.
“Once you knew you were coming back, why didn’t you tell him to join us here for dinner?” my mother asked in a tone that said she could not believe I had not thought of something so obvious.
“He wouldn’t have wanted to drive all the way here, just for food; especially not after a long day at the office.”
“In all the years I’ve been married to your mother, I’ve never come back home to a house with no meal prepared,” my father remarked wryly. “Good for you, but times have changed you know, and today women do a lot more than cook their husbands’ dinner,” I retorted defensively.
“Times may have changed, but what a husband expects from his wife hasn’t,” he answered dryly.
I was already kicking myself enough without his help, and not ready to listen to anymore of his low opinion of me as a wife, let alone a woman. I stood up and stretched with exaggerated fatigue.
“It’s been a long day, and I have a long drive back; so, I’ll be going now,” I announced.
Thankfully, neither one of my parents objected; so, after kissing the children goodnight, I hastily made my exit.
JULIE
Once I had let it slip to Kenneth during our meeting that David and I were still having sex, he had left in a huff, and I had not heard from him since, despite my numerous calls and texts to him.
His cold shoulder treatment hurt more than I ever thought it could, and I blamed David for my pain; if he had not been so selfish and determined to satisfy his own physical desires that morning, the sex with him would never have happened, and things with Kenneth would still be great.
Instead, Kenneth was breaking my heart, and David was treating me like I was no more than a piece of property at his disposal, whose sole purpose was to please and satisfy him, regardless of how I might feel; so, it was a huge blessing to have Sandra around that Monday evening when he dropped by, as it meant he could not take what he had probably come for – my body.
Sandra, on the other hand, could not have been more at ease around him, as she cheerfully chattered on about her school term, even though knowing David as well as I did, I could tell he was not in the least bit interested in her stories. It was no surprise when he left within an hour of arriving.
While I was relieved he was gone, probably having picked up on the tension between us, Sandra was curious about his quick departure.
“How come David didn’t stay for dinner?” she asked, trying hard to sound casual, though I could tell she was fishing for information.
“He does have a home, you know,” I answered dryly.
“I know, but I seem to remember him having his dinner here the last time I was around.”
“He’s a grown man; he can have dinner where he chooses,” I snapped, now irritated by her open nosiness.
Thankfully, she knew when she had pushed too far, and wisely changed the subject.
“Should I go give Junior his bath now?” she offered meekly.
“Yes please; thanks,” I nodded, now feeling guilty for having snapped at her the way I had. I knew what was really bothering me – and it was not Sandra’s nosiness; the truth was I missed Kenneth, and was terrified that I just might have lost him forever.
DAVID
I could not remember the last time I had been truly alone at the house before that evening, and the peace and quiet was oddly refreshing. Furthermore, it gave me the space and time I needed to reflect on my failed visit to the apartment, and re-evaluate the whole situation with Julie.
She had clearly used her sister’s presence as a shield to avoid being alone with me, and considering that I was the one who had given her money to pick up and keep her sister around for the holidays in the first place, her attitude only irked me more than I already was.
I might have let her get away with it this evening, but if she thought she could continue to hide behind her sister, she had another thing coming; for when I next returned to the apartment, I was determined that we would have the talk I had planned, sister or no sister.
Some might have thought it was foolish of me to be pushing to rekindle my physical relationship with Julie when things were going so well between Diane and I, but I did not see why I could not have my cake and eat it too – especially when I was paying for it.
Even though she would never be the perfect traditional wife who kept a clean home, cooked a perfect dinner every night, and raised adorable, well-behaved children, I could tell Diane was trying her best to get our marriage back on firmer ground, and I appreciated the fact that she respected me enough to make that effort.
While my affair with Julie might have started because of my problems with Diane, her failings no longer had anything to do with the continuance of it; if I were totally honest with myself – apart from Junior – the real reason I was holding onto Julie, was the sense of power and control our affair provided.
The knowledge that she was totally dependent on me, and that I, therefore, held her very livelihood in my hands – and more importantly that she realized this – was intoxicating and something Diane could never provide.
margaretwamanga@yahoo.com
Source: The Observer
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